Kyla's Diary

At times one can get upset about things that happen to you that you can not do anything about. It makes no sense to be upset about something you can't change anyway but as well Mistress as I are no strangers to the fact that it sometimes happens to us.

A few days ago, we were looking for new hair for me as by now half the place we play in had the same hair as I started wearing half a year ago. You would think they would be more original and go look for themselves instead of trying to copy someone. Ahhhh well, these things happen so I had to find something new.

A thing that changed lately in SL is that objects you wear, are these days often sold with a script inside to makes it "easier" to make them fit. This means that you can scale the entire object up or down in steps of 1%, 5%, or 10%. Also there is an option to scale, rotate and move single prims of the object that way. So you basically are taken through a menu now and forced to move things around in extremely small amounts what could have been done a hundred times faster in the editor than like that.

So far, nothing wrong with it as a lot of people have difficulties adjusting it with the standard tools. Most I know can do it very well though and way faster in the editor instead of scripted. Still nothing wrong as long as you have the choice of doing it by hand or by the menu.

Here is where things get messy. Designers have a new tool implemented in their items and whether you want to or not: THIS is the way you can adjust things and NO other way allowed anymore. Meaning that what someone, who is capable of editing manually, can do in 10 minutes, can now not even be done in 10 hours anymore.

As you can tell, by even writing this I get upset again by those idiotic designers. OK, I will count to 10 now and continue with the point of it all...

When trying out some hair with Miss, she made a remark that certain pieces of it, she did not like. Well, I know how the new tool works so: Let's adjust it then to see how it looks. Well, after like 200 mouseclicks I was perhaps 5% further in how I wanted things to look and since it is not worth getting RSI because you want to adjust a single prim, I cursed frustrated about the idiotic designers and announced I would never take that hair.

That's where Mistress came in and calmed me down:
Miss: Shhh Sunshine, calm down. We go just look somewhere else for hair.
Kyla: Yes but I really like this hair.
Miss: Then you should take the time to adjust it girl. This is the way it works. If you don't like it, complain with the ones who sell it.
Kyla: Sighs but simply takes the first option. To go somewhere else.

I know that this is the best way as when you really contact the seller either one of two things will probably happen:

• They will not reply at all by it. After all, this is new and in their limited view, it's the 8th wonder of the world. So customers should not complain.
• You will get a reply explaining how very good this is for a big group of people and you are the only one complaining (right, because most more experienced people simply don't buy there then anymore).
  

Sometimes something can happen that will make it necessary to forget for a while that I am Mistress's girl and and instead focus on simply being there for her in another way.

Yesterday such a moment arrived when Miss told me she lost a dear friend of her. I did not care at that moment for the proper decorum and me being her girl. That can wait till later! Instead I felt Miss needed two arms and for her girl to show that she is much more than only her girl. I felt I had to step forward and present me as Miss' wife but most of all as another dear friend.

Miss was really upset with what happened (who wouldn't). Yesterday and the coming days, just as long as is necessary and comfortable for Miss, I will simply be there for her to talk to, cuddle her and in general... be there for her as she is always there for me.

It feels not strange at all to step out of my role and be the "strong" one for the time being. Miss will, when she is ready, without any doubt let me know that I am to be at her feet again and ready to serve her once more as we both feel is right. Just not right now...

I will always be there for You Miss.

Love,
Kyla

Of course the day after my previous entry, in the evening we had our final talk about what happened. It's not as if we both did not see each other's views the day before. We really did.

Thing is... Miss was just angry and I was disappointed about what happened. I know now better than to pull a stunt like that again and Mistress will never have to be angry at her girl anymore for that reason.

The public whipping was taken off as a reward for the fact that I finally managed to do something that I did not manage to do before but what may be expected from a submissive: Swallow my pride and beg for forgiveness, even if I was not convinced at all that I had made a mistake.

A while back, I wrote that I felt something shifting inside me. Better understanding what being submissive is about. Since that time, we have had less (none?) true collisions anymore. And even if I made a mistake here and Mistress was angry at me for that reason, there was not a collision this time either as I immediately went to her and asked for forgiveness.

Last entry, I wrote that I was upset about it. Well, I was! It is scary and somewhat degrading to have to lower yourself even if you think you are right. When I look back at it now though, I'm all giddy about it. I managed to be that what I truly feel I want to be. Even if it was hard, it felt exactly right somehow. I am Mistress's girl and was put in my place as such. A big turn-on!

So we had our talk. Miss was sweet and caring; we both acknowledged that we could understand each other's views on it at that moment and most of all: We increased our positions towards each other.

I melted in her arms this time. Somehow, each time when something like this happens, it seems as if our relation deepens. We come out stronger and stronger and we totally belong together. As I said in a joke afterwards: "Miss as captain and her girl steering in all the wrong directions".

Looking totally forward to be at her feet again tonight...

Love,
Kyla

Yesterday it was me who made the proposition to go shopping with Miss. Now it's not a difficult thing to get her that far of course. Her shopping skills are almost legendary and she loves to show them off. Yet, yesterday I was able to surprise her.

After Miss had her cup of coffee, we went to see some shops. First one that Miss knew already (of course). I went there because I knew they had miniskirts and somehow Miss put it in her head that they would look good on me. Besides that, they had swimwear too and Miss wanted to buy some.

Miss found her swimsuit and we both bought a miniskirt. Of course Miss and I agreed for the skimpiest skirt possible for me. Secretly I believe she simply likes it when her girl is exposed. Less of a secret is that I like it myself *blushes*.

Then we found another shop with swimwear as I wanted to have some too. Regretfully this shop was better build than filled. The place was built at sea with a cavity underneath that could be used as a cuddle corner, but looked awfully dangerous to my eyes. The shop itself had nothing that interested me and soon we were heading for the next shop.

This one was more to both our liking. The better kind of clothing, yes but the more expensive one too. Decadent? Naaahhh, the girl at the entrance had way bigger diamonds than we (damn... have to see if we can change that). Anyway... I found an outfit for Miss but we were not sure about the colour. I thought off-white would look good while Miss always tends to go for black. We didn't buy it yet as we agreed to look on further first. But now I have to return there tonight to get them both so we can see who was right.

In the next room Miss found a sundress that she thought was "wow". Thing is... she wanted it for herself but I thought it to be more of the softer clothing fitted for a sub maybe more than for a Mistress. Eventually Miss agreed and told me to buy it for myself. Yes, it does look good on me and we were both happy with the outcome.

Time to go home, cuddle and say bye. Tonight I will see her again!

Love,
Kyla

Well thanks for that info but what is it exactly you did then?

Saturday, November the 29th, Miss and I declared ourselves wife and wife. Since we know each other for well over a year and I am hers for almost half a year now, it's not as if we were rushing into things on this.

A month of planning, a lot of work in the last few days (what else as we both love to run around in KoS way too much) and then finally the first guests arriving.

Nervous? You bet! Strange that you can be nervous about something like that. When you look forward at it and just use your brain then it is nothing more than a fun time with mostly mutual friends and the two of us making some promises to each other.

Then why nervous?
Because to me, and I know to Miss too, it was more than just a party with a small detour. We both take this commitment very seriously and did not go lightly in this as we both had relations in the past breaking up fairly quickly. Sure, we already were committed to each other but it does feel different anyway.

We had an Arabian theme in mind for this evening. More for practical reasons than anything else, because we have our land build up in an Egyptian setting. We even live in a Bedouin tent (with all luxury possible of course) and our dance floor is part of the environment.

The guests were promptly arriving at 21:00 local time and we waited till 21:30 before we assumed this was it and gently directed people to the dance floor. Miss asked asked our guests to give us a few moments to look each other in the eyes and make our vows.

It was a short but very intimate ceremony. I remember me melting when I heard Miss's words. I was afraid that after that, I would have difficulties finding my own and I would look like a complete fool, stuttering and stammering and looking silly in general. Eventually I did not have any difficulties with it and Miss even IM-ed me to speed up because she was now the one being nervous and couldn't wait for me to finish. Of course I did not listen to her this time as it were my vows after all (I know Miss did not mind it anyway despite her nervousness).

When Miss told me I should get an email soon, I knew exactly what she meant. Faster than she might have imagined I checked it and found there exactly what I knew would be there:

Dear Kylara Kuhn,
You have received a Second Life partner proposal from
minihai Ames. Please visit the link below to view the proposal.